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Morning News

focus-ratings-mornoing newsGood morning...

I am sorry for the lateness of today's Morning News.

I set up a script to create the ratings overnight but it didn't run so I have had to manually run them this morning.

The link to Wednesday's Ratings (top three horses) in PDF format is... http://compassratings.com/data/compassratings-2020-04-08.pdf

The link to Wednesday's Ratings (all horses) in PDF format is... http://compassratings.com/data/compassratings-full-2020-04-08.pdf

Something to make you smile...

The Engineer and the Guillotine

On a beautiful Sunday afternoon in the midst of the French Revolution the revolting citizens led a priest, a drunkard and an engineer to the guillotine.

They ask the priest if he wants to face up or down when he meets his fate.

The priest says he would like to face up so he will be looking towards heaven when he dies. They raise the blade of the guillotine and release it.

It comes speeding down and suddenly stops just inches from his neck.

The authorities take this as divine intervention and release the priest.

The drunkard comes to the guillotine next.

He also decides to die face up, hoping that he will be as fortunate as the priest.

They raise the blade of the guillotine and release it. It comes speeding down and suddenly stops just inches from his neck.

Again, the authorities take this as a sign of divine intervention, and they release the drunkard as well.

Next is the engineer.

He, too, decides to die facing up.

As they slowly raise the blade of the guillotine, the engineer suddenly says, "Hey, I see what your problem is ..."


The twin twist

One day, Einstein has to speak at an important science conference.

On the way there, he tells his driver that looks a bit like him:

“I’m sick of all these conferences. I always say the same things over and over!”

The driver agrees: “You’re right. As your driver, I attended all of them, and even though I don’t know anything about science, I could give the conference in your place.”

“That’s a great idea!” says Einstein. “Let’s switch places then!”

So they switch clothes and as soon as they arrive, the driver dressed as Einstein goes on stage and starts giving the usual speech, while the real Einstein, dressed as the car driver, attends it.

But in the crowd, there is one scientist who wants to impress everyone and thinks of a very difficult question to ask Einstein, hoping he won’t be able to respond.

So this guy stands up and interrupts the conference by posing his very difficult question.

The whole room goes silent, holding their breath, waiting for the response.

The driver looks at him, dead in the eye, and says :

“Sir, your question is so easy to answer that I’m going to let my driver reply to it for me.”

Today

Whatever you are up to today...

Stay safe and healthy.

As always...

My kindest regards

keith-eckstein1

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